What Is a Nanny Share?
The majority of nannies in the US obtain employment through an agency. Both nannies and families must decide if they are a good fit. It is the same when working with a nanny share. The difference is that there are two families involved, and each must be sure that both the other family and their nanny are also a good fit.
The arrangement for the families will share the expenses of a full time nanny. The biggest difference will be vacation time. When one family takes vacation, so does the nanny. Always be sure to look at the bigger picture. Ask the other family how they want to handle the vacations and holidays.
It is equally important for the nannies to agree on a schedule in advance. Things to discuss include whether the nanny will care for both families’ children simultaneously, and how sick days will be handled for each family member. Or, will there be a primary family who will schedule the time off, and the other family be responsible for taking their kids to a family member or sitter until the nanny returns to work?
When both families have children under school age , it’s often easier for the nanny to travel to one location. She can have the morning with the other family, and come to work with her "primary" family after lunch. This arrangement allows her to have only one family to work with at any time, and everyone is happy. Other arrangements can be made, however. If both families have children in school, then the "off" family can take their child to school, while the nanny teaches the "on" day family’s child in a mini-classroom at the "off" family’s home.
Also, if one set of children is younger than 12 months when the other family has older children, the younger family would have to find a different arrangement until the baby is old enough to leave with the "primary" family.
As with any arrangement, communication is critical. We have helped many families iron out the kinks in their arrangements. From sickness and vacations to child care, nannies are very accommodating, and the best rules come from a compromise.
Essential Components of a Nanny Share Arrangement
The contract should define the exact terms of employment and contain the following key components: (1) Summer/holiday schedule, (2) Payment details, and (3) Vacation/leave policies.
Summer/Holiday Schedule
If one or both families have children who are school age, they need to keep in mind that the summer and holiday schedule may look different than the year round schedule. This may mean that the parents will use the nanny for, say, 8 hours a day instead of 9 and off at, say, 3 or 4 instead of 5 or 5:30. Or that the family does not need coverage for Friday through Sunday. How the families want to handle any extra hours for camp coverage is up to them, but the holidays should be clearly defined.
Payment Details
The parties need to agree on when payments are due and, ideally, treat the payments to the nanny as if she is an employee. The nanny share should be able to arrange to be the employer withhold and pay Social Security and Medicare taxes on behalf of the nanny. The parties also need to make a decisions regarding the following items: (1) who will pay the nanny should one family go on vacation; (2) who pays for sick and personal leave (personal leave may be unpaid); (3) possibility of a yearly bonus; (4) how tips will be divided; (5) and whether there should be a minimum number of working days.
Vacation and Leave Policies
Some employers pay their employees time off including vacation, sick leave, and personal leave. The parties should discuss and determine the following: (1) how many vacation days will be allotted; (2) can two-week vacations be coordinated; (3) how personal time off is handled; (4) how sick leave is handled. The agreement should state: that the parties will notify the nanny in advance of vacations, weekends, and holidays when the nanny will be needed for work; to the extent possible, the parties will coordinate vacations and time off; the parties will provide the nanny with at least two (2) weeks notice of absences for work; the time off provided by the parties will be in increments of four (4) hours; and should a party desire to terminate the employment relationship, they agree to provide the nanny with at least two weeks notice.
Legal Aspects of Nanny Shares
Families who plan to enter into a nanny share or move forward with one must ensure that they do not run afoul of the law. Certain legal considerations may come into play. These considerations include issues regarding taxation, insurance, and compliance with labor laws.
An employer, in this case the mothers in a nanny share, must withhold income and social security taxes, and unemployment insurance if the tax threshold is met. Many families entering into these arrangements consider whether to legally employ the nanny or to keep her as an independent contractor. While some families may continue to treat the nanny as an independent contractor, there are hidden risks to doing so when it comes to taxes. For example:
Having the nanny as an independent contractor only works if the families track the amount of work that the nanny performs for their family individually. This may get complicated if the nanny works full-time for one family. Please note that there are certain classifications for dependent contractors for whom neither income tax withholding nor FICA withholding are required (e.g., for casual domestic workers earning less than $2,300 in any calendar year).
Families are also interested in understanding the tax implications of their nanny share arrangement. Often, families contribute the entirety of the nanny’s salary. If so, the IRS doesn’t permit the family to ‘double dip’, i.e. the family cannot claim the child care tax credit or the dependent care benefit on their taxes in addition to the contribution they made.
If multiple families are going to share a single nanny, then insurance is needed. For employees, this typically means workers’ compensation and other liability insurance. If the employee is paid as an independent contractor, liability is more complicated, and possible coverage is dependent on the contracts entered with the nanny.
Labor laws, specifically in the area of overtime, also require consideration. A nanny is entitled to a minimum wage and overtime like any other employee (i.e. time and half), unless she is exempt from overtime laws. The federal Fair Labor Standards Act requires the employer to pay time and half for all hours worked in excess of 40 hours a week, or eight hours a day. In certain cases, the law does except live-in nannies from the overtime requirement, but only if they are paid on a salary basis at a minimum threshold. As a result, the only situation where a share arrangement using a single live-in nanny would work is if the nanny earns $682.00 per week or more, and the families meet the requirements for being ‘households’. This option may work if there are only 1-2 children, and if they are exclusively part-time (school-age, for example). Still, given the potentially limited savings in labor cost, hiring two live-in nannies may be a better choice. And some families simply find it unappealing (for a variety of reasons) to share a nanny with another family.
Setting Boundaries for Nanny Responsibilities
When it comes to determining how to address the duties that your nanny will be responsible for, you and your co-parents will need to have a frank discussion about the duties that you need the nanny to perform on a weekly basis. You will also need to determine when the nanny’s work hours will begin and end, which is also important for purposes of overtime.
In some cases, parents may choose to alternate household duties that fall outside of the job description of their nanny. For example, while they may ask the nanny to monitor playtime, they may choose to supervise bathtime. They may also take turns providing meals for their children. Depending on the number of children involved in the arrangement and developmental stage of your respective children, this will prove a difficult topic to navigate.
If your nanny is responsible for a portion of household duties, it is important to clearly delineate exactly what she will be doing. The last thing you want is for your nanny to feel as though she has been saddled with more than her fair share of household responsibilities.
You will also need to consider how differences in parenting styles affect your nanny’s duties. For example, if one family generally does not allow their child to consume sugar-laden snacks near the television, while the other family does. Do you want your nanny to remain on a strict no-sugar policy when commuting between households? Alternatively, would it make sense to allow the nanny to supervise the child’s snack time, and let the decision about which snacks to have be made by the parent whose household she is in?
These are important considerations to keep in mind when drafting your nanny share agreement.
Conflict Resolution and Adjusting the Agreement
Disagreements between parents can range from a mere annoyance to a malignant cancer that destroys a nanny share in its formative stages. The Nanny Share Agreement is a contract to mediate family disagreement and plays a critical role in the decision of who gets to win or lose. The smarter the agreement, the less reason there will be for misunderstandings arising. Additionally, an agreement that clearly spells out reasonable terms for resolving conflicts is essential to ensure that the business of babysitting and budgeting does not get in the way of parenting. The first dispute will likely center around the payment of money. Think of all the things you spend money on. How do you resolve financial disagreements? Disagreements over money are common and every child-care relationship has to start with a financial agreement. Because money is the most common source of conflict between families, it is also the starting point when negotiations begin. Make sure that all compensation concerns are resolved before the nanny shares the spoons with your child . Written agreements and payment authorization are the starting point for making a claim in the event of a misunderstanding as to what was agreed to. Modifications to the Agreement. Generally, either or both parties can modify the agreement with written consent of all three parties. It may end up being necessary to modify the agreement to incorporate additional services or to accommodate a shift in the sharing circumstances such as schedule or location. Alternatively, the agreement can be terminated by either or both parties with two weeks written notice. If you follow these rules, conflicts can be resolved and amended in a manner that allows life to go on and helps to avoid conflict. While you probably have a good idea of what you want the agreement to be initially, the further along you go in negotiating the agreement, the more you have likely invested, emotionally and financially, in the outcomes. Do your best to avoid power struggles. Start with the understanding that a business contract is not personal so don’t take the terms of the agreement too personally.
Strategies for Effective Nanny Sharing
Consider your Care Provider a partner; in order to foster a successful relationship, you need to be respectful, communicate and go above and beyond to make sure this is a healthy and helpful arrangement for you and your children. Tips for successful nanny sharing
- Have a meeting before starting the arrangement to discuss the particulars of your goals for the shared nanny, house rules, vacation schedules, and any deal-breakers.
- Communicate often, preferably every few days for at least the first couple of months, letting each other know how things are going. Then, institute weekly or bi-weekly meetings for at least the first couple of months in order to ensure everyone is happy with the arrangement. Make these meetings known in advance, adding them to your shared family calendar. As with a marriage or committed relationship, you need to have regular check-ins to keep communication lines open and to respectfully resolve any issues.
- Communicate with your nanny as well. If your nanny agreed to be part of a nanny-share only to be both your and your friend’s nanny, then only education and give your nanny all of the information she needs to do both sets of job requirements. This will show your nanny that you respect her as a professional caregiver, while also making her job easier.
- Be sure you have effective backup plan in place in case a parent or a nanny has to travel or miss work unexpectedly. This might mean that the nanny will have to care for both families for an extended period of time. It might also require one of the parents to take off time from work or even hire a temporary nanny.
- Be smart about schedules. Stagger your schedules enough to avoid putting the entire burden on the nanny if a parent has to miss work or pick up a child early.
- Determine the hours of employment and make sure both families will abide by those hours. Don’t continually ask your nanny to stay late because of your work schedule. This is unfair to your nanny and to your friend. If you have to work late on a reasonable basis, ask your friend to pick up your child, giving advanced notice. If you have to work late on an unreasonable, regular basis, then you will need to make other arrangements.
- Schedule playdates for your children with other children, as well as with each other’s children, for the sake of the children and the nanny. Otherwise, your nanny will be stuck fielding unsolicited playdate requests from other bored families.
- Finally, be fair and honest with the nanny and with each other about the capacity of your nanny to handle both families’ needs effectively. The goal is to provide quality care for your children. Check-in regularly with your nanny to see how she is doing with the arrangement. If the arrangement isn’t working, communicate this clearly and respectfully to the nanny and to each other. Nanny shares can definitely be beneficial for everyone, but they are not for everyone and not for everyone at all times.
Nanny Share in Practice: Real-Life Examples
Alex and Taylor live a few blocks away from another set of parents, Jamie and Morgan. The two families were acquaintances and decided to explore the possibility of a nanny share. Each set of parents contributed $2,000 a month towards the arrangement. The nanny shared a notebook with both families in order to keep track of doctor appointments, schedules and planning. She also asked each family to commit to providing a 2-week paid vacation each year (the nanny shares vacations with both families so they can travel together). Each family also agreed to share household expenses equally (i.e., diapers, groceries, toys, etc.) so they could avoid the hassles of calculating reimbursements.
Jessica and Rob and Stella and Steve live in the same building and decide to share a nanny who is hired to work from 8:00 until 6:00 p.m. on Mondays through Thursdays and from 8:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m. on Fridays. Each family pays the nanny $800 a week during this time (making $400 a week for each child). Both families agreed that they trusted each other enough to provide keys to their respective apartments to the other family, so that they could drop their child off at the nanny’s apartment and pick him or her up. The families also agreed to rotate use of their apartment to host playgroups or meetings as necessary . The nursery school that both children attended had staggered drop-off and pick-up times to avoid a flood of children at once. Because the families lived close enough to each other, they were able to take advantage of the flexible drop-off and pick-up times to accommodate their work schedules as best they could.
Sarah and Ross had a 5-year-old daughter and 3-year-old twins. They decided to share a nanny with another family with children of very similar ages. Their nanny worked from 9:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m. Monday through Friday. They also agreed that they did not want to share the nanny even more than that, to help keep the children’s routine stable because they were sharing a nanny with another family. Fortunately, the two families coincidentally had very similar work schedules. Sarah and Ross agreed to pay the nanny $1,500 a week. Each family had to pay $750 per week to the nanny. Each week during orientation, the families would "take turns" with parent-led activities with the children, while the nanny arranged the crafts and other activities. The two families also agreed that the nanny had to share detailed notes about lunch and snack menus and arrange for all dietary needs (most of which were vegetarian-related).